Hollywood Rant

Goodbye Hollywood

So, all packed and moved out.  I left the apartment empty and covered in dust. I have to go back tomorrow to collect deposit and hand over the wi-fi thingy.  I am pleased not to be going back there.

When Jennie and I moved into The Chateau de Fleur we did so to escape the lives we had and wanted to change when we went into rehab.  For Jennie it was the beginning of a life away from being a porn performer.  For me it was to escape the exquisite monotony of Malibu, the pornography, the internet hook up sites and the gruelling symptoms of sex addiction.

Amazingly, for the longest time, I steered clear of the worst of my sex addict tendencies.   Until, of course, I met Jake and collapsed..once again..into active addiction.  As much as I try..I cannot forgive him.  I was doing so well.

I tell you, I hate him now more than anyone I have ever been wronged by.  More than the vile people who ran over The Darling Big Dog and more than I ever harboured for my step-father.

Masquerading as an innocent, timid boy JB knows exactly what he is doing.  I would urge anyone that gets involved with him never, ever believe a word that comes out of that mouth.  His lies are not even very amusing.  An amusing liar, like Leigh Bowery or Diana Vreeland can enhance a dull world but a tepid, self-serving liar like Jake can only make the mediocre a paler shade of taupe.

The only good thing that came out of his mouth was my cock.

I though I might write about the day my dog was killed in front of that building, in front of me and the little dog..but I can’t, not least because the memory of her written on the same page I write his name would sully the memory of her.

To think, he left his gf and flew to me.  I tended him, looked after him, cooked for him, dabbed at his tears.  I reassured him again and again that things would work out fine..and I am sure they will for the conniving little cunt.

Goodbye Hollywood.   Hello New York City.

Letter from Susan:

I drove my father to the Stiperstones last Saturday  – creamy golden late afternoon sunshine lighting all that hilly beauty – he was so happy. But all I could think of was the time we drove up there in his little Mini – I rammed the car off the road at a funny angle and we then draped ourselves around the seats and dashboard. Do you remember how much we laughed when people came to help and we woke up ? I still find it quite funny.

I do remember..and it was really funny.

10 replies on “Goodbye Hollywood”


Did you see the author Terri McMillan on Oprah yesterday? You must watch it! (I think it replays during the week.) Terri was married to a man for 8 years who one day, while laying in bed with her, announced that he was gay. Then he tried to sue her for alimony! It got ugly. They went to court. She relives her anger on Oprah and then tells how she has finally gotten over it, moved on, forgiven. Its a must see for you.

Oh Duncan I wish I could help you stop with the obsessive thinking about this man who so obviously doesn’t deserve to be an afterthought in your life.

I meant “even an afterthought”. Have you considered commiserating with the girl? There is something about snarking it up with an exes ex that really helps put things into perspective.

Talk about scorched earth –
I think even Joe Kennedy (the elder) would be impressed by your…

Most of you seem to just egg Duncan on! School yard stuff really.

I enjoy your Blog Duncan and dip in every now and again because it makes for a great read as well as, to see how you’re getting on. But the fan club seem to relish when you lash out and they get far to involved for your own good. Mob rule!

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