Woke up too late for therapy. Haven’t been for days. As my leg heals and I begin to face the onslaught I feel myself edge toward isolation once again. A perfect prison. This house is so beautiful..why leave?
Isolation: the great and enduring refuge of the addict/alcoholic.
I have a bunch of Billy Childish paintings that I am going to sell, apparently there is now a market for them. I am limping through this economic disaster like so many people. I have paintings for sale in two major auctions this winter.
I’ll get by. Just like all the rest.
The economic situation will not kill me. My balls may.
Jennifer popped by yesterday as I lay on the couch with my leg elevated wrapped alternately in ice and thick socks. This morning it feels a whole heap better but I don’t want to test it by jogging down the hill now do I?
Everything in the valley is green once again after the heavy rain. It takes no time at all for nature to change its clothes. It’s going to take a few weeks to dry out over here in Malibu. Now, now that it’s California Autumn. My deck is still damp. As Jen pointed out within one week we have had a 50 degree temperature slide. This time last week it was 110 degrees. I always think about the firemen when it rains heavily. Just how happy they must be. Perhaps we have escaped the fires once again this year..yet..as the rain falls the fuel grows around me for the next big fire.
Watching home buying/selling/renovating shows on TV. Houses back East are OK. The further West, the worse the interiors. Until you get to LA: The Land That Taste Forgot. I watch one show after another..unless the houses/people are too ghastly then I look at the food network. Chefs battling with each other to win thousands of dollars. Chefs as gladiators.
I have no interest watching anything even vaguely dramatic. I dip into TV drama occasionally but the acting is stilted. The stories are dull. The lighting, more often than not, too dark and moody. Less light seems to equal serious to the average director/DP.
The dogs are totally bored.
Ashley and Aaron took Willie out yesterday but The Lil Dog refuses to leave my side.
They have stopped grading the Rambla Pacifico road repair. There is some small legal issue that they need to solve. It depresses me when I can’t see them working down there. Rapunzel up here needs that fucking road finished.
I must admit that I spend more and more time looking at unsavoury, addictive web sites. The less time I spend in therapy the more time I am at my computer screen..looking…wondering…thank GOD Ashley is downstairs.