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Queer

Provincetown 2015

This morning the Supreme Court ruled that marriage equality is the law of the land.

Now that the marriage equality battle has been won, let’s see if gay white men can talk about the needs of other people… like women and people of color.  Let’s see if they can confront their own racism and misogyny?

Shame on those gay men who sneered at the brave trans woman Jennicet Gutiérrez who confronted President Obama at his cozy lgbtq brunch!  Jennicet was violently berated by gay white men for shouting at the president.  As it turns out there is no polite way to be heard over the chorus of gay white men sucking on President Obama’s ass.

As I found out when I was housed in the LA County Jail trans women are regularly abused by the deputies charged with their protection.  As I have written before I saw women made to lap dance for deputies, their breasts fondled… and on two occasions I saw trans women beaten for no reason.

I had a long walk through Provincetown with Queer Director of Paris is Burning, Jennie Livingston.  We had a lovely time.  I talked at length about my own gender issues, the therapy I was having and my ultimate conclusion about the trans community.

Jennie Livingston

For me, I do not believe (after two years of therapy) that I can accurately claim that there is another me trapped in the wrong body.  I do not have a women’s brain, I do not have the experience of being a woman or a girl.  I do have the experience of being an effeminate homosexual.  I have the experience of attraction to hyper masculine men or straight men.  I know gay men who had breast implants and hormone therapy to act on those desires, to recreate themselves so that they might be more attractive to straight men.  I did not.

I can tell you absolutely that there is a soul I wish to make free that seeks to escape my body but it is not the soul of a woman.  I can tell you that as I grow older I can finally admit that I have no relationship with my penis.  I can tell you that if I were to have had gender reassignment therapy as a young man I would have identified as bisexual because I seek the comfort and strength of a straight man and the love and affection of a woman.  Neither would expect me, in my ideal world, to have a penis.

My Spring Kilt

Why isn’t it ok to say this:  Rather than adopt the definitive gender of a man or woman as per the current trans agenda (as I understand it) I prefer to wear the clothes of my choice, to have plastic surgery that remakes my face and body as I see fit (as do millions of men and women world-wide) and change pronouns as befits my understanding of the way I want to be perceived… that I am a creation of my own delight.  I am NOT a biological woman trapped in an unyielding male shell but an all together more exotic creature who loves to express myself as I shall determine.  I was never a little girl, I do NOT have a woman’s brain.  I am my own special creation.

I do not need your validation to be who I am.  But I do need you to treat me and people like me with care, consideration and respect.

On occasions when I have dressed and worn make up two things happened:  I was told that I was ‘too masculine’ to be anything other than a man.  And on one occasion a so-called enlightened cabaret performer saw fit to remove my make up at the dinner table.  I did not have the luxury of Bruce Jenner’s effortless apotheosis.

Here is a spring album to cheer you up.